“When a man invades a woman’s body space without her invitation, touches, grabs and gropes her without her consent, he violates her sovereignty of person. He evicts her from her own body. Our bodies are our first homes. If we are not safe in our bodies, we are always homeless.” - Shailja Patel
Louise Bourgeois, To Unravel a Torment You Must Begin Somewhere, no. 8 of 9, from the series What is the Shape of this Problem?, 1999
— A Tale of Outer Suburbia | Hands Like Houses (via mirroir)
this is the correct response. Please respect EVERYONE’S desires and wants at any given time.
Lets get society sexually liberated not sexually liberal, anyone can want as much or as little as they like.
Last week B triggered me. And 48 hours later I yelled at him. Through a Facebook message but I yelled at him regardless.
He called and apologized. No defense, no apologetic explanations. A simple apology. It broke me but in a good way. I don’t think I have words to express how much a simple apology meant to me.
Sex positivity means many things, but it does not mean that all sex is positive or enjoyable.
This is important. For many survivors, sex is repulsive. Don’t be afraid of it.
Shrin Neshat’s works Unveiling, Women of Allah and Rebellious silence really really intrigue me for some reason.
To lift yourself out of a miserable mood, even if you have to do it by strength of will, should be easy. I force myself out of my chair, stride around the table, exercise my head and neck, make my eyes sparkle, tighten the muscles around them. Defy my own feelings, welcome A. enthusiastically supposing he comes to see me, amiably tolerate B. in my room, swallow all that is said at C.’s, whatever pain and trouble it may cost me, in long draughts.
Yet even if I manage that, one single slip, and a slip cannot be avoided, will stop the whole process, easy and painful alike, and I will have to shrink back into my own circle again.
So perhaps the best resource is to meet everything passively, to make yourself an inert mass, and, if you feel that you are being carried away, not to let yourself be lured into taking a single unnecessary step, to stare at others with the eyes of an animal, to feel no compunction, in short, with your own hand to throttle down whatever ghostly life remains in you, that is, to enlarge the final peace of the graveyard and let nothing survive save that.
A characteristic movement in such a condition is to run your little finger along your eyebrows.❞
Trigger Warning: ed, self harm
I keep thinking about my therapy session yesterday and I’m truly so grateful to have a decent therapist. I told her yesterday that I was fighting off slipping into an eating disorder and that I have been looking at this cut on my hand (it was an accidental cut). Like I know I’m not going to cut but I keep rubbing it, wishing it would stay. We figured out a plan to work through things and I cried out of relief. I know these are things I have to deal on my own but to know that someone else knows, that someone else will work through it with you and you’re not burdening them in any way, is so incredibly relieving.